Last night was the first night out for Darwyn and me. No, that isn't to say that we never leave the house; mores specifically, it was our first night out without Levi since Levi came into our life.
I was really nervous about leaving him even though he would be staying with a friend of mine who also has a toddler son (about 6-weeks younger than Levi). They've played together many times. There was no real reason to be nervous other than the simple fact that it was indeed the first time!
Some people say we should have time to ourselves more often. Well, I don't think Darwyn nor I are lacking from alone time. We take advantage of Levi's nap times or after he's gone to bed at night to have our few minutes together... to discuss things... or, well, whatever. I'm sure we could have a few sitters lined up to call at short notice, but frankly, we don't feel the need to go out of the house to have our alone time. If we want to go out to dinner for a change of pace... we do, and we take Levi with us. Levi is extremely well-behaved, and because he's so friendly with wait staff, his being with us probably makes the night out more enjoyable.
I know lots of other couples, parents of young children, who utilize sitters regularly. That is entirely their choice. I think it's great if they need to get out to enjoy their time together. I guess maybe it's because Darwyn and I really aren't the partying types, we're more like homebodies and therefore don't feel the need to go to the movies or bar or where ever it is that folks go. We would spend most of our time at home anyway... with or without the addition of Levi.
But about last night: Darwyn was officially inducted into the ranks of Senior Non-Commissioned Officers. He'd been in class all week... wearing his dress uniform and everything (he he)! I'm very proud of him and his friend Ryland for finally making it to this point in their Air Force careers. Congratulations!
I was honored to accompany my husband during this ceremony and lend him my uninterrupted attention for the night!
I guess what it all boils down to is that--without having Levi on my hip, I was able to devote my attention solely to my husband even if only for a few hours. I know he appreciated it because it certainly doesn't happen very often... not that I don't pay attention... but that I seldom am able to pay attention to him and only him. Toddlers have a way of demanding your attention :)
Oh, and my nervousness was, of course, all in vain. Cheryl said Levi and JB had fun playing and wearing each other out, and she enjoyed Levi's cuddliness when bedtime rolled around.
Congrats to Ryland and Darwyn and special thanks to Cheryl for making the evening possible. Our first night out was, I guess you can say, a success!!
My Life
Friday, July 23, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
it's the process of writing, not the words
I was just now taking advantage of a napping toddler to have a few minutes to myself. I've concluded that I should take a few minutes every day to write a few lines even if nothing more than to rejoice and say that I've made it through to live another day... to be Darwyn's wife... to be Levi's mom!
The life of a housewife is not usually very glamorous, but I've discovered in the past year since I resigned from my job, that the rewards for this life are FAR greater than the monetary benefits or accolades and recognition you get for your "job well done." I don't miss the commute to work nor the drama of office politics. As a household we miss the second income, but, even then, only a little. We're still comfortable and very happy... and far from starving! And the million little things that happen every day in the life of a mother (especially that of a newborn/toddler) are a million times more rewarding than all that other stuff!
As I sat down here this afternoon while Levi was sleeping, I took the time to re-read my post from June... the one about losing Freckles and the baby. Wow! I forget just how much catharsis there is in writing! I sat here sobbing as I read over the events of those few days. It's not that I forgot about any of the details, but I forget just how pointed my written word can be. It was in reading what I wrote a month ago that I was reminded just how much catharsis exists in the process of writing... the process of taking time to think... the process of allowing yourself those few moments to encompass all the emotions. In the moment of writing, the words themselves don't really matter that much, the meaning is in the process.
The words take on their meaning when you read them later.
Oh, there it is. The bell has rung! The timer is going off! I hear the cries of a toddler as he awakes from his nap.
And so my moment to myself is over...
for today.
The life of a housewife is not usually very glamorous, but I've discovered in the past year since I resigned from my job, that the rewards for this life are FAR greater than the monetary benefits or accolades and recognition you get for your "job well done." I don't miss the commute to work nor the drama of office politics. As a household we miss the second income, but, even then, only a little. We're still comfortable and very happy... and far from starving! And the million little things that happen every day in the life of a mother (especially that of a newborn/toddler) are a million times more rewarding than all that other stuff!
As I sat down here this afternoon while Levi was sleeping, I took the time to re-read my post from June... the one about losing Freckles and the baby. Wow! I forget just how much catharsis there is in writing! I sat here sobbing as I read over the events of those few days. It's not that I forgot about any of the details, but I forget just how pointed my written word can be. It was in reading what I wrote a month ago that I was reminded just how much catharsis exists in the process of writing... the process of taking time to think... the process of allowing yourself those few moments to encompass all the emotions. In the moment of writing, the words themselves don't really matter that much, the meaning is in the process.
The words take on their meaning when you read them later.
Oh, there it is. The bell has rung! The timer is going off! I hear the cries of a toddler as he awakes from his nap.
And so my moment to myself is over...
for today.
the longest week as Levi's mom
The best way to sum up this week is to say thank God we're still breastfeeding because it's been his only sustenance! Poor kid. Not to mention poor mom and dad.
What started out as a runny nose then settled into a cough eventually turned into diarrhea and vomiting. ugh! Levi got a cold that his cousins were nice enough to share with him while we were in IL. It was the usual stuff: stuffy/runny nose and a little cough... and of course, not sleeping well. That went on for a few days while in IL.
The drive back to FL on Wed, 30 Jun, started off well enough. Levi seemed to be feeling better, at least had slept better that night. Was sleeping well on the trip when somewhere in South Georgia, we stopped for gas. I took the time to give Levi a break from his car seat and nurse. As soon as he sat up, he threw up all over me, himself, the truck... poor guy. It was a mess! Of course, we both had to change clothes inside the gas station bathroom.
He was fine the rest of the trip, no trouble eating. And was fine the next couple days. The diarrhea started Friday evening then hit full force on Sat. At least it wasn't in cloth diapers! That would have been much worse.
Sunday morning, I was so proud that he was eating all the stuff on the BRAT diet for diarrhea... then up it all came! All over him, the chair, the floor... oh boy! That was the beginning of the end. He couldn't really eat much of anything except a few crackers or cheerios here and there. He was able to nurse pretty well most of the time, but was still throwing up every now and then. So it settled into the routine of vomiting between 1 and 3 a.m. every morning (if not more than once...) and having diarrhea during the day.
Poor guy.
Again, thank God for breastfeeding because it was pretty much his only sustenance. And I'm sure it was a great comfort to snuggle with Mommy when you're not feeling well :)
Forgot to mention that we'd gone to see the pediatrician on Monday. He gave us some meds for the cough. But his advise was that as long as there was no fever with the vomiting/diarrhea, you'd have to just let the virus run it course... and keep the baby hydrated.
The nastiness lasted a full week. The following Saturday was his first non-diarrhea diaper (not completely normal but better); and Sat night was the first night without throwing up! YAY! There was much rejoicing in the Lowery house that day!!
The next problem to deal with was the poor thing wanting to eat everything in sight! I couldn't keep enough food in front of him for those first couple days. I also felt like I didn't have enough milk to satisfy him since he wanted to stay latched on all night long.
It was exhausting for all of us!!
Oh, and did I mention the laundry...
What started out as a runny nose then settled into a cough eventually turned into diarrhea and vomiting. ugh! Levi got a cold that his cousins were nice enough to share with him while we were in IL. It was the usual stuff: stuffy/runny nose and a little cough... and of course, not sleeping well. That went on for a few days while in IL.
The drive back to FL on Wed, 30 Jun, started off well enough. Levi seemed to be feeling better, at least had slept better that night. Was sleeping well on the trip when somewhere in South Georgia, we stopped for gas. I took the time to give Levi a break from his car seat and nurse. As soon as he sat up, he threw up all over me, himself, the truck... poor guy. It was a mess! Of course, we both had to change clothes inside the gas station bathroom.
He was fine the rest of the trip, no trouble eating. And was fine the next couple days. The diarrhea started Friday evening then hit full force on Sat. At least it wasn't in cloth diapers! That would have been much worse.
Sunday morning, I was so proud that he was eating all the stuff on the BRAT diet for diarrhea... then up it all came! All over him, the chair, the floor... oh boy! That was the beginning of the end. He couldn't really eat much of anything except a few crackers or cheerios here and there. He was able to nurse pretty well most of the time, but was still throwing up every now and then. So it settled into the routine of vomiting between 1 and 3 a.m. every morning (if not more than once...) and having diarrhea during the day.
Poor guy.
Again, thank God for breastfeeding because it was pretty much his only sustenance. And I'm sure it was a great comfort to snuggle with Mommy when you're not feeling well :)
Forgot to mention that we'd gone to see the pediatrician on Monday. He gave us some meds for the cough. But his advise was that as long as there was no fever with the vomiting/diarrhea, you'd have to just let the virus run it course... and keep the baby hydrated.
The nastiness lasted a full week. The following Saturday was his first non-diarrhea diaper (not completely normal but better); and Sat night was the first night without throwing up! YAY! There was much rejoicing in the Lowery house that day!!
The next problem to deal with was the poor thing wanting to eat everything in sight! I couldn't keep enough food in front of him for those first couple days. I also felt like I didn't have enough milk to satisfy him since he wanted to stay latched on all night long.
It was exhausting for all of us!!
Oh, and did I mention the laundry...
Friday, July 16, 2010
About pregnancy loss
This post is written for inlusion in the Pregnancy Loss Week Blog Carnival. Please join us at Fertility Flower for the week of August 23-27, 2010 where we will be featuring articles, posts and artwork about pregnancy loss.
How did the loss of a pregnancy(ies) change you as a mother to your living or future children?
The loss of my second pregnancy just 5 weeks ago (on the same day we lost our 12-yr-old dog) made me appreciate how quickly a mother and father can bond with their unborn baby. It also made me that much more thankful for the joy that my 14-mo-old son brings to my life! He was absolutely what kept us laughing and kept us sane during what could have been a very depressing time. We want to get pregnant again and are hoping it happens in the next few months, but I have to say that experiencing a miscarriage causes you to wonder about your body and whether you're still capable of carrying a baby to term.
What actions did you take to memorialize the lost child/children?
The child we will never know hsa been memorialized with a charm bracelet for me and a dog-tag necklace for my husband. I included our son's birthday on one charm/tag and the date of our loss on the second. It was my husband's father's day gift this year (the loss was only a week prior). Also I figure we can add more charms/tags if we have more children. :)
Even though we move on with our lives, the loss of that baby will always leave an empty space. We may go an to have more children, but none will ever replace the one who was lost.
How did the loss of a pregnancy(ies) change you as a mother to your living or future children?
The loss of my second pregnancy just 5 weeks ago (on the same day we lost our 12-yr-old dog) made me appreciate how quickly a mother and father can bond with their unborn baby. It also made me that much more thankful for the joy that my 14-mo-old son brings to my life! He was absolutely what kept us laughing and kept us sane during what could have been a very depressing time. We want to get pregnant again and are hoping it happens in the next few months, but I have to say that experiencing a miscarriage causes you to wonder about your body and whether you're still capable of carrying a baby to term.
What actions did you take to memorialize the lost child/children?
The child we will never know hsa been memorialized with a charm bracelet for me and a dog-tag necklace for my husband. I included our son's birthday on one charm/tag and the date of our loss on the second. It was my husband's father's day gift this year (the loss was only a week prior). Also I figure we can add more charms/tags if we have more children. :)
Even though we move on with our lives, the loss of that baby will always leave an empty space. We may go an to have more children, but none will ever replace the one who was lost.
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